Knock knock... Who’s there? Joy and depression...

The Guest House

This being human is a guest house.
Every morning a new arrival.

A joy, a depression, a meanness,
some momentary awareness comes
as an unexpected visitor.

Welcome and entertain them all!
Even if they're a crowd of sorrows,
who violently sweep your house
empty of its furniture,
still, treat each guest honourably.
He may be clearing you out
for some new delight.

The dark thought, the shame, the malice,
meet them at the door laughing,
and invite them in.

Be grateful for whoever comes,
because each has been sent
as a guide from beyond.

Rumi

It can be so hard, can't it? Feeling at the mercy of difficult or painful thoughts and feelings. You think you've shut them out, battened them down, sent them packing with distraction or positive affirmations or double-gin & kettle chips… but like an inflatable beach ball pushed under water - they pop back up somewhere else very soon.

How human we are!

We think we would do anything to be free of our bad thoughts and feelings. But often it's us that clings to them (I wanted to punch my meditation teacher when he told me this). We fixate, ruminate, research how to be rid of them. We constantly focus on what we're trying to free ourselves from and by doing so we feed up a big fat mind-made monster*.

* who's inclined to develop monster-tourettes after a night on the gin

The very essence and practice of mindfulness and meditation is to welcome difficult thoughts and feelings.

For as Eckhart Tolle says “what we resist persists”.

And I feel Rumi summed it up perfectly back in the 12th century, in his poem The Guest House.

When the difficult thought or feeling pops up, instead of suppressing it, we allow it to be there. We say “hi, welcome, yeah you're a bit ugly but come on in”. We let it come over us and we observe it, roll with the punch of it, watch how it moves through us.

As one very dear loved one who's facing a very hard and painful time said to me the other day:

“You sit with it and you feel the feelings and you allow… you allow yourself to feel whatever it is you feel… and in that moment there is a release and a peace. And that's what happened on Saturday morning when I was looking at the beautiful ocean and saw the sun dancing...”

Here's to opening the door, letting it in, feeling it, being human - knowing that behind it all the sun still dances : )

Love, Jo x